I realized that today. There is a guy who is in two of my classes, and he asked me how I was , and I proceeded to give an overly worried account about how I was afraid I had crashed my USB drive (which I hadn’t, it worked fine).
As my least favorite class started, I realized that I kept on complaining and worrying about life, and looking at all the negative things. I didn’t like that class in some ways, but wasn’t too bad. And iit didn’t have to be that bad. It’s a literature class, and I currently do not like studying literature. But in true philosophy spirit, I can enjoy watching the teacher make arguments, and then I can come up with objections to his argument. These objections include he is manipulating the data to fit his thesis, or he is reading too much into a text, or he completely missed the point. So, I can enjoy the class because I don’t always have to think the teacher is right. The class can be fun.
Anyway. I actually enjoyed class that day–it was a lecture completely on the Protestant Reformation, before we start studying Spenser–and though I didn’t agree with all the conclusions the teacher was coming with, it was enjoyable to see exactly how he was manipulating his data to fit a certain thesis.
And in the class I realized that I was being too negative about my whole life, and I was worrying too much, and, because of that, becoming too self-centered.
So, after class, I talked to that guy again. I asked him how his life was. He said, “There’s nothing to complain about.”
I said, “I complain to much.”
He wisely said, “You do. You don’t need to worry about thing.”
I don’t have to worry. I can love life, be grateful that all that I have. I have been ungrateful and negative, but I am not past change. And when I see a weakness, I can work to change it. Today, I realized I complain too much. Even if I do worry, I don’t have to be negative when I talk to other people. They don’t need to hear it.
And I can be happy with the life that I have. I can actually be positive and help other people to be positive.
So I am going to attempt to do better. I wrote “Stop complaining” on my hand. I told my mom to tell me to stop complaining. And hopefully, and I can start to be a more positive person. I can be happy with what I have.