I woke up at 4:30 in the morning because MM needed to be fed. And as I did so, I realized that whenever I dream about a library, I dream of the library I went to when I was little. Before it was remodeled. I had even forgotten it had been remodeled.

But in my half-awake dream state, I could clearly picture the old library. And I could remember where the Pee Wee Scouts books were at, even. There were short, metal shelves, and the Pee Wee Scouts books were in the children’s section, on the back, with the other short chapter books.

I don’t reminisce that much, really. But as MM sucked away, I thought about childhood and tried to remember.

I wrote some things down. I could remember what my elementary school used to look like (before it was remodeled–why do they have to remodel everything?). I could remember the old house I lived in when I was five and under. I could remember our old minivan. I could remember crashing on a bike. I could remember my sister crashing on her bike and splitting her chin open. Inline skates we used to have. Sidewalk chalk. Mom playing mother may I with us. Playing traffic in the driveway. Going to Disneyland. Playing house in the playhouse out back. Fighting over pretend names. A pair of black overalls. Playing teddy and kitty at recess with my twin sister. Loving shoes and loving buying them when I was little. Playing hide and seek. Tan arms. Playing with my cousins. Dad singing to me in the night. Sleeping outside with popcorn and having Mom telling us stories about when she was young. A pair of ugly plaid shorts I wore in sixth grade. Walking home from school, and running a few times in order to play with my cat. Writing in my journal with Dad. Saying family prayers at night and going around in a circle as everyone said their prayers. Going to my first sleepover. Planting my name is radishes. Fishing with Dad.

I just haven’t thought about it for a while. Little things will stir up little memories, but I don’t really dwell on the past at all.

But it was good, early in the morning, to remember it a bit. I’ve had a good life. Better than I’ve realized.


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